It’s unfortunate that you didn’t get out as much as you had hoped from this clip and I think I hear some frustration and disappointment in your writing. I would also feel frustration if I thought I hadn’t gotten something out of a five minute clip, so I can relate to your experience.
I notice that I experience some anger and a strong desire to defend the speaker after having read your message. You took a stab at the man in your comment. While feedback is appropriate, saying someone is a terrible speaker without giving examples or suggestions for how to do better is destructive and inappropriate. That’s not the way to go, not with ourselves and not with other people.
Your comment also made me feel compassion for you. I can imagine that you might be experiencing this in your own mind as well, harsh attacks without specific examples for improvement. That’s a tough spot to be in, and I sincerely hope you find relief from this way of relating to yourself and any other tool you are searching for in this course.
I would agree with you that Daniel’s speaking ability isn’t the best that can be found on the web, however, I would rate his ability as a solid 6,5-7 out of 10. I think it’s understandable that he isn’t the best speaker out there, as he seems to be a counsellor and not a professional speaker.
In addition to speaking ability I also want to rate his caring for his subject, which I think comes across as a 10 out of 10. I was especially moved by the way he describes people coming alive as the self-critical voice looses its impact at the end of the clip, that is heart-felt caring right there. I once heard a saying, it’s not what they say too you, it’s how they said it. And I applaud Daniel for this and his sincerity.
Hi Daniel. Thank you for your wonderful points. This was a really informative piece, I appreciated the importance of doubting the critical voice and I somehow got the image of believability/doubting on a scale from 0-100 vs either I believe it or reject it completely. And above all, I appreciate the wonderful work I hear you are doing with your clients, your caring comes through in this clip.
I’ve been struggling with my horrible critical voice for so many years. In therapy I have named him: Joe Bob. I really related to the feeling of being “fused” to the voice. Right now I’m not feeling particularly stressed and I have a lot of space from Joe Bob. But in stressful situations I can just sit there believing everything he says and feeling like I can’t get out of it. I remain fused to the voice and so I can’t get out of depression. Sometimes I try to think about how other people would see me in the situation and it helps but the voice still seems so true.
No good.Terrible speaker and poor ability to direct his point.
Hi Gina.
It’s unfortunate that you didn’t get out as much as you had hoped from this clip and I think I hear some frustration and disappointment in your writing. I would also feel frustration if I thought I hadn’t gotten something out of a five minute clip, so I can relate to your experience.
I notice that I experience some anger and a strong desire to defend the speaker after having read your message. You took a stab at the man in your comment. While feedback is appropriate, saying someone is a terrible speaker without giving examples or suggestions for how to do better is destructive and inappropriate. That’s not the way to go, not with ourselves and not with other people.
Your comment also made me feel compassion for you. I can imagine that you might be experiencing this in your own mind as well, harsh attacks without specific examples for improvement. That’s a tough spot to be in, and I sincerely hope you find relief from this way of relating to yourself and any other tool you are searching for in this course.
I would agree with you that Daniel’s speaking ability isn’t the best that can be found on the web, however, I would rate his ability as a solid 6,5-7 out of 10. I think it’s understandable that he isn’t the best speaker out there, as he seems to be a counsellor and not a professional speaker.
In addition to speaking ability I also want to rate his caring for his subject, which I think comes across as a 10 out of 10. I was especially moved by the way he describes people coming alive as the self-critical voice looses its impact at the end of the clip, that is heart-felt caring right there. I once heard a saying, it’s not what they say too you, it’s how they said it. And I applaud Daniel for this and his sincerity.
I wish you all the best Gina.
Sincerely,
Ronnie
sounds a tad critical 😉
Hi Daniel. Thank you for your wonderful points. This was a really informative piece, I appreciated the importance of doubting the critical voice and I somehow got the image of believability/doubting on a scale from 0-100 vs either I believe it or reject it completely. And above all, I appreciate the wonderful work I hear you are doing with your clients, your caring comes through in this clip.
Sincerely,
Ronnie
I’ve been struggling with my horrible critical voice for so many years. In therapy I have named him: Joe Bob. I really related to the feeling of being “fused” to the voice. Right now I’m not feeling particularly stressed and I have a lot of space from Joe Bob. But in stressful situations I can just sit there believing everything he says and feeling like I can’t get out of it. I remain fused to the voice and so I can’t get out of depression. Sometimes I try to think about how other people would see me in the situation and it helps but the voice still seems so true.